My boss and I choose each and every product that Afinia will offer vary carefully.
Every line and manufacturer is agreed upon. We both have veto power, and we have used it liberally... to make sure that our catalog is something we can be proud of.
While we agree on every line, sometimes we don't, um, see eye to eye on every product. Here is an example:
The Gerstner Wood Briefcase
Now, Gerstner is a fine company. A long manufacturing tradition, an untouchable reputation for quality, and products that anyone would be proud to own. Personally, I am looking forward to owning this collector's chest someday.
But a wooden briefcase? I don't get it. My boss thinks its cool. So for today's list, I have the
TOP TEN WAYS TO PROMOTE THE WOOD GERSTNER BRIEFCASE
10. Make my boss try to take a Gerstner BriefCase through airport security
9. Advertise all Gerstner Products as 'dart-proof' for businessmen travelling to places where they still shoot people with tranquilizer darts. You know, the far east and the jungle and maybe even South Beach.
8. Promote it as the ideal case for people who still carve their business documents in stone.
7. Offer a free can of wood polish with every briefcase purchase.
6. Publishing a warning - not to use near open flame -
5. Offer to make a donation to the Sierra Club for every purchase made: "With your new wood briefcase, a donation has been made in your name to replace the tree we cut down for this thing..."
4. Offer self-defense classes to women who are working late at the law firm. How to use your briefcase to fend off attackers in parking ramps or something like that...
3. Offer an optional set of legs so it can be converted to a dining table. (Or just buy one of these - they're much cooler).
2. Offer engraving services. "In honor of 10 years with the company, you get a briefcase that no one would ever use, to put next to your 5-year paperweight service award (which you also never use)."
1.Create a businessman exercise routine (Briefcase Curls, Briefcase Lunges, Briefcase Press). You'll build muscle mass in no time with the Gerstner Wood Briefcase!
By the way, did you know people tried to predict the market based on how full Greenspan's Briefcase looked? Turns out he was just taking his lunch to work somedays. Imagine how stable the market would have been if he'd used one of these...
By the way, with regards to #6: You'd be surprised how often warnings actually help sales. I once worked for a company that sold laser pointers - when we put a little warning box in the ad about not shining it in people's eyes, sales went through the roof!
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